First Fall - coming to theaters August 2014

The beginning of my first fall semester as an academic librarian at a university looms in the quickly approaching distance.

What if the professors in my liaison areas don't see me as being on the same level as them? Every subject area I've been assigned ends in ology. I barely passed most ologies during my undergrad. How can I talk the talk when I don't even think of myself as being on the same level as these professors? I didn't even know what "testing instruments" were in relation to psychology until a month ago. I've never done a literature review, and I certainly never took a class called "Research methodologies."

What if I open my mouth, and stupid comes out? This is actually based on an incident from a couple of months ago. I was at my first big university workshop thing, sitting next to my Dean, in front of 40 people from across campus, and the facilitator of the workshop asked me a question about something I'd heard of, but didn't know much about. Under the stress, I panicked, and rather than say, "I don't know, I've only read about that, but haven't had any hands-on experience." Stupid came out. All over me. I felt like I was wearing it the rest of the afternoon. Like I'd thrown up on myself, and as punishment, I was forced to wear my soiled clothes until I got home and could change.

Breathe, Deana.....breathe.

What if you kick ass at your new job? Students might love your goofy down-to-earth personality, and faculty might respect your honesty about your knowledge limits, and appreciate your natural curiosity. Remember, you are here to be their guide, not to have all the answers.

Derbrarians and smackademics

Roller reference, anyone?
Working on Halloween, 2012

"From one derbrarian to another, HBD, and hit a bitch!"

This was the birthday wish I posted on Conan the Librarian's wall. I'd never heard or used the word "derbrarian" before, and thought I was awfully clever for creating, what I believed was, a new word.  "Maybe it ISN'T a new word?"

Being a curious librarian, I turned to the interwebs, and a quick search brought up a number of blogs and articles about roller derby playin' librarians:
- A blog post, and CNN clip about MegaBeth, who used to play for Rubber City Roller Girls.
- Jessamyn West went to a derby bout and discovered there are a number of derbrarians

I knew there were a goodly number of librarian's that played derby, but I didn't realize it was so big that the phrase was already a thing!

It was a couple of days later that this article from Slate showed up in my feed. Roller derby as a college sport?! Skating and derby had been showing up in my dreams for a couple of weeks too. Was this all a sign that I needed to get back on the track?

I haven't practiced with my new derby team yet, because life hasn't calmed down to a point I feel I can take on a new endeavor. Also, I accepted this new position to focus on my career. I'm not even sure I'll have the time, money, and energy to devote to derby. Plus, I don't like doing things half-assed, and I know how much of time derby can take up. 

Since I'm not currently playing derby, but I've got an itch to scratch, I decided to do a little research. Why are there so many librarians who also play derby? Is it a coincidence that both roller derby and librarianship are chalk full of stereotypes, and dominated by women? In trying to smash stereotypes, are we just creating another one?

I must admit, I get a kick out of seeing the reactions when folks learn I could hip check them into a shelving range. In searching for articles on librarianship and roller derby, I came across the concept of "smackademics" from this Chronicle of Higher Education article. It's my new favorite word. It says, "I'm smart, but I'm also tough." I also like the idea of broadening my field of inquiry to include ALL involved in academia.

So now I'm left to wonder.....could I get a scholarly article published on this topic? Surely, I can't be the only person who is interested in investigating the intersection of derby and librarianship?

I don't like reading.

There, I've said it!

I'm even tempted to use the word "hate", but I feel that might be too strong.

As a librarian, I battle with this on a daily basis because it goes against every librarian stereotype, and makes me feel like I'm betraying my chosen profession.

I struggle with librarian stereotypes that would lead you to believe on a cold and rainy day, you'd find me relaxing at home, reading a book by the fire, and snuggling with my cat. I'm not overly fond of cats, and would rather snuggle with my dogs, or do something creative, than read by a fire. I struggle with the assumption by patrons and friends that I can recommend a "good read" at the drop of a hat. I can't even remember the last book I finished. Wait, yes I ca....no, no I can't. I struggle with my place in a profession so rooted in something I suck at. Reading.

For me, reading is not a leisurely pursuit. It requires great concentration, that usually ends in frustration. I'll find myself reading the same passage over, and over, only to have retained none of it. It's easy for me to get distracted while reading, because my eye doesn't just follow along with each line, but wants to skip from place to place. For me, a page of text isn't an invitation to a new understanding of something, but a blurred mass of black and white that makes me cringe. I know it will be a battle, and some days my armor isn't strong enough to wage it.

Because it takes me so long to read a whole book, even a "fun" fiction read, I don't usually have the opportunity to read new releases. Many public libraries only let you borrow new releases for 7 or 14 days, and I'd be lucky to make it halfway through by then. Can gainfully employed people really finish a whole book in that amount of time?!

I take solace in the fact that the profession is evolving, and I am finding places where my unique talents and interests can be put to use. Also, since I'm faculty, the loan period at my new institution is one year. Maybe I'll finish a book this year!

20 resumes, 5 interviews, 2 continents, and 1 thumb drive

On any given day, as many as 5 or 6 thumb drives are abandoned in the library. They are forgotten for a number of reasons. The biggest factor is probably that our CPUs are mounted behind the monitors, so you can't actually SEE your thumb drive once you've connected it. I'm guessing most people are frantically working on a paper, finish it just in time for class, print it off, pick up their pages in a hurry, and forget the thing that their paper is saved on. These lost thumb drives have resulted in calls first thing the next morning from panicked thumb drive owners, to students casually inquiring months later if we still have it.

I have a couple of  thumb drives. I like to keep my resumes and cover letters on one, and other random documents on another. I have had my resume thumb drive for over 6 years. I'm not sure if this is due to the importance of the information on it, or if I'm just more responsible than the average student. It's a nice and simple design, no logos or flashy colors. Just brushed metal. It has a nice weight to it, and I like that the "cover" is attached. One less thing to lose!

Browsing through the files on my thumb drive is like a walk down memory lane of all the jobs I've applied for. There was the Craigslist "framer" job I applied for when I first moved to Santa Fe, and was desperate for ANYTHING full-time. I recall sending a follow up email to the poster, professing my love of picture framing, how I missed it, and how I wished to return to that industry. I never heard back. I hate that! "Maybe it was building framing, and not picture framing they were needing?" There was the resume for the job at a university in Kazakhstan. I'm sure it would have been an adventure, which is what I was looking for, but I can't help the sinking feeling that I dodged a bullet turning down the offer of an interview with the higher ups. There are resumes for jobs that would have taken me somewhere I didn't really want to live, but would have been professionally satisfying, and vice versa.

My thumb drive also houses the resume and cover letter for the position I will be taking on in a little over a month. I feel a little like Goldilocks in that this position seems, "just right" compared to so many of the others I've seen, applied, and interviewed for. This new opportunity will take me out of the state, and back to whence I came...ish. I'm OK with the "ish" portion, and more than a little excited about it. A new city to explore, new opportunities, and the chance to reinvent myself. I have no idea what the future will bring, but I'm looking forward to finding out!